Shirts not optional

After reading the blog written by American Bridget Jones and her fun with internet dating (from the 30 something perspective) I thought I should search the pickins on Match for the 50+ crowd.  Now I can certainly understand and appreciate the fact that we aren't 20 or 30 and that NONE of us probably look like we did when we were younger.  That said, I fail to understand the logic of showing exactly HOW much we don't look like 30 something anymore.

To support that statement, I give you bachelor number 1...the picture below is his profile picture.  Who, after seeing the shirtless well...HORROR, can even begin to take a peek at his about me section.  I mean...your shirt appears to be hanging on the back of your chair...why not put it on???  Did you really think appearing shirtless was a way to "catch" women at your age. Sorry Bub but you are missing the washboard abs and the gun biceps...we may be in our 50's but we haven't totally lost all sense of what is and isn't sexy.

Ok..sorry to put you all through this, but there are more... Yes MORE I am so sorry to say.  Another shirtless wonder ... Ewwwwwwwwwww.  Here we have the cowboy stud (try not to laugh too hard, you are gonna need oxygen when we get to number three).  Bachelor number two seems to think that sucking the gut in and striking a pose with a cowboy hat makes you sexy.  Unfortunately its probably been years since this cowboy's wrangler butt drove any girls, women or 80 year old grammys nuts. I mean SERIOUSLY, I don't know you, don't assume I want you to start undressing before I finish reading your profile... that is if I haven't put the laptop in the oven after seeing your picture.

Now as I said to begin with, I am willing to overlook the fact that none of us are 30 somethings anymore. I understand aging...it happens to us all. What we make of ourselves as we age makes all the difference.  That said, I just CANNOT get past Bachelor number three's profile picture. Part of me wanted to message him and ask if this is really him.

Ok...now that you have spewed whatever you were drinking through your nose, all over your desk and possibly into your keyboard....I have to apologize again. I am truly not a finicky or selfish person., but DUDES ... seriously???? Match, I think it would have been much more humane for you to disallow these pictures by sending the standard "she's just not into ewwwwwwwwww"  save your money and move along bub.

Now, all I have to do is hope that the bachelor crew above doesn't think I was checking them out because I had romance in mind! If that happens I will have to kill my Match account.

Another weekend going going gone

It has been far too long since I shared anything.  Things around here have been stressful...but some humor always finds its way in to the mix.

Case in point, I had to take a trip home in January. My 80 year old mom, matriarch of the clan, had a lumpectomy to remove a cancerous tumor in her breast.  All I can say is ... all hail Susan B. Komen and every other organization who has supported breast cancer research. While she still has some radiation and possibly some chemo to do...early detection was key in my being able to see the humor in what happened. Lesson learned - do not forget those monthly self exams ladies!

My parents taught me that you should always look your best...you never can be sure when opportunity will knock and when it does....you gotta look like you were expecting it.  Sooo, in that spirit, at 4 a.m. on the day of my mom's surgery, after a mostly sleepless night, I got up and went through the motions of putting my makeup on and curling my hair.  As I was staring at the mirror asking myself WHY oh why was I going to all this trouble to spend the day in some waiting room - I heard a little voice say....cuz you want to be ready if that handsome doctor comes in!!!  So as I snickered to myself, I applied an extra coat of my makeup (it was going to be a very long day!).

So, things were as uneventful as they could be for most of the morning. Mom was moved from lab to x-ray to  here and there.  Finally the time came to go to the surgery waiting. After a while, it was finally time to get wheeled in to surgery one of the nurses and a nurse anesthetist came to pick her up. The nurse anesthetist showed mom the preop shots he was going to give her. We chatted a minute and he said it was time to give good bye kisses.  Mom thought he was too cute and from there in her hospital bed was trying to get me to flirt with him...when it became obvious that I was woefully out of practice, she interceded and introduced me to him... As he wheeled her out to the surgery suites i couldn't help but smile...ever the mom, even when going under the knife, she was still looking to set me up. When she came out of surgery she commented on what a cutie the "hippie" nurse had been (he was wearing a print surgical cap).

Yes mom, he was cute but I really didn't come home to shop for the next Mr. Right.

Here's to another week. May it be a healthy one for us all.

Must Love Dogs?

Welcome everyone!!!  This is my first attempt at blogging.  The title, Wasted Days, Wasted Nights and Wasted Cleavage, was a suggestion from a friend, co-worker and  blogger veteran Tiff. I decided to run with it -- I have some cleavage to spare. I'm here to share my dating experiences...particularly the internet dating scene as well as some advice about internet dating.

I got the idea of trying internet dating because I am one of "those" people who is always on a computer and never has time to get OUT in a more traditional sense. Plus, I thought it might be a safer way to get to know someone. I signed up on one of the internet dating sites and uploaded some pics...filled out their surveys, the "about me" stuff, the profile blurb.  Whew.  (It was after 2 days of toiling over what to say in my profile that I thought maybe this internet dating is NOT worth the hassle!)  I wish I would have listened to myself and just left a half finished profile...but noooooooooo, not me...I am persistent and had to prove that I have the stamina to make it through this ordeal.  

So having finished my novela, I logged off the dating site.  Upon logging back in, I was bombarded by ALOT of potential suitors.  Just remember - NO ONE is that popular.  I know I am a catch but even when I was a 20-something hottie I didn't get that much attention. 


How to spot a scam artist giveaway number one - alot of scammers use a first name, say Jason, as their last name. Scam artists commonly use two first names and may forget what they told you their first name is. So they will say they are Jason Justin.

Giveaway number 2, many of these suitors are "God fearing" men looking for women to fear God with them.  Apparently the scam artists of the world believe that all Americans are over religious zealots.  Some are 100% centered around this theme.  Some even say they are looking for a woman to cook and clean and be there for them...in other words to wait on them hand and foot (NOT around MY house buddy).  Next blog I will share some of these profiles so you can see exactly what I'm talking about.


Giveaway number 3 -- does the person list any actual preferences in their profile?  All I can say is puleeeeeeeze -- If you don't have any preferences as to height, body type, hair color, education or religion that could be your problem.  I have some idea of the type of person the next "Mr. Right" is and I can assure you he also has an idea of who he is looking for. It is very noble indeed to be so open that you don't care about weight, body type, income, education, religion or political leaning but to have absolutely no preferences is not realistic.


The final lesson for this blog, giveaway number 4 is that these fake profiles, mostly Nigerian scam artists, are running rampant in the internet dating world.  I am amazed at how many of them claim to be in the construction or jewelry business and may claim they travel extensively.



So there you have blog number one. Just a little taste of the internet dating world... I will be sharing more with you in the coming year.  Until then...read, read and re-read those dating profiles people and note NOT one of them has said Must Love Dogs. Where is John Cusack when you are logged on???